Ferdonia was killed by her children, but she continues her lonely life in pain

He's laying down his suit for the kids he's got. I eat bread in tears. Surrounded by pictures, clothes, and their glands, he postpones life, which says it has been hard and unfair for him. This is Ferdone Qerkezi, whose husband and four sons were killed.

They took it away on March 27, 1999, never to return. And the big house remained empty, cold, as did her heart, which froze as she was taken from her children who raised them.

She tells about them, and her face overflows with tears. He says that man is stronger than stone and that he can face such great pain. Ferdonia, which, amid tears of morning and morning, and the cold nights spent alone, continues her life with great pain within her. With the pain of a mother who was taken away and murdered by those who bore her, who were more dear to her.

A day of mine is very difficult. Especially breakfast. I get up in the morning, alone night. Always reminding the husband of the four boys. They're back at lunch, they're having lunch, they're going back to work, they're back from work... I make it a little breakfast, with an innkeeper. That without an inn, I'm bleeding. I used to do housework, I keep pictures. I keep waiting for guests and I keep an eye on the house. As I have had my husband, my four sons and daughters-in-law... it's hard to live alone. But with God's help I'm living. I haven't waited this long to face. But thank God I'm coping with this aside”, she told Kosovapress.

Amid tears and sadness, she relates the thrilling event of that rainy night when her sons and her husband were taken away from her and her smile, joy, and happiness.

There's some light rain falling that day. We were held in front of the basement doors for an hour and a half. He said the secretariat told us he'd have to watch them tonight. He's got a bomb. NATO... 23 people got us into the basement... They just sat down. I said we don't have rakia right now. He said keep you. I said we're holding on, but now he's got us shot... Meanwhile, coffee is required. I went out to make coffee. She needs two coffees. I made the middle coffees from the basement floor on the first floor. I made two middle coffees, I came down. I gave this Dragan and this other guy and he said one of them, and I want him worse. That coffee was taken by somebody else, I went up and down on the first floor, I got the kitchen there. When you get on the beach, they tell me what you got. I said nothing, that's how it came to me. Don't worry about it. I said thank you. It was a little relaxed, and I took my coffee and bought it for him. I know which Dragan or the other one. So I drank coffee around the church table doing something, when Dragan is telling Halim, you Albanians should be cut off. The husband answered why, we had a good time, we didn't have a bad time. He said it's time to cut off your Albanians. Your spouse said you can do whatever you want. That's where I saw that... (about)”, she said.

And the 14-year-old Edmond was taken out of his sleep that had caught her behind her back. She gets sick of showing this scene, and the great pain that only a mother can experience. A mother who awakens her baby from sleep to deliver it to murderers.

“I took men all over. He was called by names. They call him Anthony, Armend, Ardian, Vision, Fatos and Shpend. But Edmund's was behind me. I told Edmond boy that the police came, he ran out. When the men came out, another male returned. You've got one. They came out the same. The slaughter came back and asked us for money. Oha... the youngest 14 years”, she said.

Though she waited for them every day for five years to hear their steps as they returned home, her hope was shattered on the day she received the news that the bodies of her two sons Edmond and Anthony had been found. And for my husband, Armen and Ardian still knows nothing.

I've kept ymyt up to five years. Up to five years I have held but more until these Gjakova Albanians are in prison in Belgrade in Serbia. When they got out of Serbia's prison in 2000, then a little bit of hope is gone. But hope doesn't fade. I've kept the ymyt until there's gold and edmond. Then it stopped me... I waited until 2005. After 2005 it was seen. . The brides have spent five and a half years after the war. They took their own path. They made families. I was left alone. How much I got behind my brides they had and stronger (than) that I thought they had a big hope too, says she...

Neither the festivals of the year nor the lights of the city exist for him, since the four lights of her eyes were extinguished forever.

I've got eight members of me now, I'm just a disaster. But with God's help. There are no parties for me. Sounds like a normal day to me. I don't see anyone saying I respect parties today, but I find it hard. Of the eight members I have left alone, except God is holding me”, she said.

Yet, she remains strong, between pictures and their items, and from time to time, she seems to be there to talk to them.

I raised my photos by remembering that I'm alive. I say to them what you say to them: 'Alas for me! It's heavy enough. It's a relief to see them in the photos, because I always think they're walking through the basket. When they're having lunch, you're watching them. I think she looked at me and looked at”, she said.

He says that even when he leaves home, he has the feeling he has with him. They wait for her at the door of the house when she comes back.

I always have them with me. And when I get here, it seems, without someone getting in front of me, it doesn't leave”, she said.

She sees the cradle where she places her four sons, and she is left empty, although she has kept what was in it to rest with her grandchildren. But he never did. And from time to time, you see the toys that they bought when they were young, reminding them of the games that they once played while they were little and running around the house.

I remember the kids having fights. I remember the toys. I never thought the police would take my husband and four boys. For someone maybe but that's all they left alone, I didn't think... I couldn't understand why this happened because it happened this way”, she said.

And the flowers of Edmond, who were taken from behind her back when she was only 14 years of water, look after them because they were planted by Edmond with his little hands. He says that whenever he saw flowers grow and not withers, he hoped that he was alive, for his flowers were growing and growing. But and that hope was shattered when he got the news that they were found in a mass cemetery.

I'm looking after the flowers from the beginning. Since they've taken her husband and sons. The flower isn't always said they're on top. With the oil that the flower did not wither, they will return to their homes. Once I know that Edmund's body is back, I still save it, even though Edmund” turned around, she said.

In Kosovo, 1654 also figures are missing, while family expectations that their remains will be found one day have died out.