One of the victims of sexual violence refused status: My husband left me when he realized I was being raped.

The experiences of that night, I cannot erase them from memory even after 18 years.

It is still fresh, May 26, 1999. Children's scars, the torture of Serbian police officers, the voices of men who found no strength yet to face the shocks caused in their bodies are just a few sequences repeated over and over again in their minds.

It was the night of May 26th, when she had the dark fate to be taken by Serb forces by force, among many who were in the column, as a result of expulsion from their homes.

Once I've lost consciousness of yours, out of fear, there's a lot behind there, there's a lot behind. Since 2 and something came true, we were shot in those rooms. The brother-in-law got into that other room and your coma beats him. They led us astray as they did themselves. From both to seven in the morning. Now we've been sent to the same room on the street, and there's somebody with my brother-in-law who took us to the family. There's a coma like unconscious, in the worst, in the worst way, that's how we violated our ways” she confessed.

After that, she relates that she was never healthy. He was even forced to perform two surgical interventions because of the rape.

If not enough, she at the time had her husband in Germany.

After three years, when he returned, as she confessed, he left him alone on the pretext he had dishonored his family.

The man understands, as I understand, the entity splits up... only for why. Even he shows that this reason alone has not taken me. Never a good day behind you, and sédi every time you try just to tell yourself, don't live me. Don't live me, not a minute. It's a lot of company, a coma even for what happens to me, I don't believe it. There's no such thing as a good day for us, that just crying moments when I remember them, I'm aware I know what I'm doing and what I'm talking about, with the docks that the cretin of my head is going through, says she.

In addition to the health and economic situation, it is very difficult.

Once it was discovered that the process of verifying the status of victims of sexual violence, even though it was difficult, had applied to the government commission.

However, she was rejected by the latter, with the fact that there was not enough evidence. But this is not the only application that has been rejected.

The head of the government Commission for recognition and verification of the status of raped persons during the recent war in Kosovo, Minire Begaj, has indicated why by September 28th some 800 people have applied. But not everyone has had the luck of accepting it.

And we've admitted to their “that 143 recognized the status of the victim of violence during the war... of those refused... we have 103. I've been told the whole phase you're mentioning, all the possibilities we've been given the law and very well given this opportunity, which ultimately came to an end the commission, which has not convinced the commission of all the processes we've taken. Even a narrable, even a supportive document, finally an interview. We should remember that in some cases we have had major contradictions with the story as well as the interview. But the good news is that we've recently decided to call the side into the interview because we've considered at least having the side ahead and how little we can finally obey”, Begaj says.

However, the refused applicants still have the opportunity to apply to the commission for reconsideration. In regard to the case of the woman coming from a village of Podujevo, Anton Noecaj from the Centre for Legal Assistance and Regional Development “Clard” says she has started the first procedures for the court.

“We have led you to the court with the argument that the decisions that were made in the first degree and the second degree by the government commission are decisions and unjust arguments, and on the basis of that, we have argued the facts, including the statements of persons who were victims and persons who were witnesses, and this argument in court is sufficient, that the court will issue an act on the grounds on which it rejects the decisions of the government commission and the entire process of application of the victims which were addressed to the court, but I'm talking about the only cases... but that we have the case that we have to address the court and the court, and we expect the court to drop the verdicts of the Commission, and re-contractice, says.

Not all victims have the destiny to apply for status recognition. Some of them today continue to feel superstitious, and some of them have not even had the chance to wait for that day, have changed their lives.

Kosovo Centre for the rehabilitation of torture survivors Director Feride Rush says the long process for these victims is causing dual anxiety.

All that went into the process can be said to keep more anxiety pending about what is happening to them, what will be required, whether they make a positive decision. However, those who enter the process and don't back off from the process, the tea is a positive part that doesn't back down, but they really expect with the good hope that those with the document, the reliable documentation means they will make the positive” decision.

In March 2014, former President Atifete Jahjaga had founded the National Council for Survivors of Sexual Violence during the war in Kosovo.

She is even known as the country's only representative, who insisted that the status of these victims be known. So why the process has begun, she calls it a retard.

And to be honest, it's a bit of a delayed process, because it had to start, two years ago, even when it was first on the basis of work and on the basis of recommendations, because the commission was the result of the National Council for Survivors of Sexual Violence during the war. For one reason or another, we have addressed this issue very late in 14 or 15 years after the end of the war, and thanks to the national council for survivors of sexual violence during the war, thanks to many activists who, without institutions to say by 2013 or in 2014, have done the work of institutions in their absence of”, Jahjaga says.

The process of verifying victims of sexual violence has begun on 5 February of this year.

However, why it is known that there are nearly 20,000 victims of sexual violence during the recent Kosovo war, no one is yet convicted of such acts.

The lady's only prayer in this scripture is that one day she will be recognized as status, which is no doubt softened by the pain she has experienced for years.